I agree ! Good media has definitely helped me ease some of my own internalized fears and made things easier to encounter in real life or at least expanded my own thinking/dreaming/self-expression. Also simply just crying/ having a big emotional reaction to media shows can also signal important things too. I want to check out those shows now !
Wow this is an incredible take on an issue I haven't heard brought up before. It's sooo true!
Some of my straight male friends seem to have an aversion or fear of crossing circles with gay male friends, especially 1:1 (great point). It is a hard boundary for them. In contrast, I've seen some straight male friends explore and integrate with gay friends/ their own gender expression and they are so much happier and confident in making masculinity and sexuality their own. Toxic masculinity certainly seems to be a powerful and constricting self-image to enforce.
I typically think of SM's "constricted emotional spectrum" in the context of romantic relationships with women. You have helped me see that SM shouldn't just seek to be emotionally attuned for meaningful romantic relationships (or sometimes fake it/capitalize on it for this purpose only), but SM/GM relationships could help them expand meaningful and fulfilling friendships and their own masculinity in a whole different direction/dimension of their lives.
This is my favorite line: "allowing a man’s internal emotional spectrum to become less constricted and the external range of people with whom they can share meaningful friendships to become greater"
Thank you so much for that response - it helps me know the message resonated. There’s so much that isn’t talked about in our media, so many layers left to be represented - that won’t happen until that representation gets the keys to the production.
Re: our real lives, we’re at a point where men need to re-evaluate what male friendship is—and understand the value in meaningful friendships making their lives more balanced, including with women. But first they need to acknowledge their need for emotional support.
I agree ! Good media has definitely helped me ease some of my own internalized fears and made things easier to encounter in real life or at least expanded my own thinking/dreaming/self-expression. Also simply just crying/ having a big emotional reaction to media shows can also signal important things too. I want to check out those shows now !
Wow this is an incredible take on an issue I haven't heard brought up before. It's sooo true!
Some of my straight male friends seem to have an aversion or fear of crossing circles with gay male friends, especially 1:1 (great point). It is a hard boundary for them. In contrast, I've seen some straight male friends explore and integrate with gay friends/ their own gender expression and they are so much happier and confident in making masculinity and sexuality their own. Toxic masculinity certainly seems to be a powerful and constricting self-image to enforce.
I typically think of SM's "constricted emotional spectrum" in the context of romantic relationships with women. You have helped me see that SM shouldn't just seek to be emotionally attuned for meaningful romantic relationships (or sometimes fake it/capitalize on it for this purpose only), but SM/GM relationships could help them expand meaningful and fulfilling friendships and their own masculinity in a whole different direction/dimension of their lives.
This is my favorite line: "allowing a man’s internal emotional spectrum to become less constricted and the external range of people with whom they can share meaningful friendships to become greater"
Thank you so much for that response - it helps me know the message resonated. There’s so much that isn’t talked about in our media, so many layers left to be represented - that won’t happen until that representation gets the keys to the production.
Re: our real lives, we’re at a point where men need to re-evaluate what male friendship is—and understand the value in meaningful friendships making their lives more balanced, including with women. But first they need to acknowledge their need for emotional support.